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Trick of the Light

by Chris Canipe

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1.
Expectations 03:23
I keep setting expectations Just to be let down I’ve got my head in the lightning And my feet on the ground There’s trouble in the distance There’s trouble here now Maybe I just never noticed How the world went around I don’t know what you’re thinking But I’m thinking it too All I ever wanted Was to get close to you It’s tough out there These are strange days It’s been dry for awhile But it’s looking like rain I’ve been changing my habits I’ve been doing the work I keep chipping away I keep putting seeds in the dirt I don’t know what’s different I feel mostly the same But the air is changing Something’s giving way I don’t know what you’re thinking But I’m thinking it too All I ever wanted Was to get close to you It’s messy out there These are strange days It’s been dry for awhile But it’s looking like rain
2.
I never thought about it In the days of easy living You tend to waste a lot of time When time is what you’re given The way the shadows change With the sun on the sea Who you thought you were Who you turned out to be I never thought about it And that’s the thing about it I’d never seen so many stars But they were always in plain site I’d never stopped to wonder About all the little points of light The way the city’s lit When you see it in full Laid out in a grid in the push and the pull The way the shadows change With the sun on the sea Who you thought you were Who you turned out to be I never thought about it And that’s the thing about it I was lost and I was fading A little further every day The destination didn’t matter As much as everything along the way The way the house would look All lit up in the dark Coming home from where you’ve been Just to be where you are The way the shadows change With the sun on the sea Who you thought you were Who you turned out to be I never thought about it And that’s the thing about it
3.
Tudor houses On a leafy street You and me And who we want to be Windowsill ficus In their starter cups drunk on sunlight Just like us The third notice bills Unsorted unpaid The portals and passwords That stand in the way Abandon books That were just getting good You couldn’t put it down Then one day you could Don’t it always seem To come apart at the seams Don’t it always look different Than it did in your dreams If it always though Seems to come out right Is it our imagination Or a trick of the light The faucet drips And that crack in the wall Seems a little longer Than it did last fall Worry creeps And the mystery key That we keep in a drawer Doesn’t open anything There’s dust like stars In the window light In the chaos Making space for life It’s you and me And all of us Learning to live With the broken stuff Don’t it always seem To come apart at the seams Don’t it always look different Than it did in your dreams If it always though Seems to come out right Is it our imagination Or a trick of the light I’ve got eyes for the things that I can’t explain Blues that settle in like a steady rain I’m somewhere else Then I’m here with you Looking for the homework Or the other shoe What you gonna do Don’t it always seem To come apart at the seams Don’t it always look different Than it did in your dreams If it always though Seems to come out right Is it our imagination Or a trick of the light
4.
We share the same city We idle at lights We shop the same aisles We move through our lives With kids in the backseat And mail in the slot Not enough time For the things we’ve got I wonder about you Do you wonder about me Do you see the same Color blue that I see The villains in your stories Are the heroes in mine we’d change different things If we could go back in time With fences for neighbors And flags in the yard We keep to ourselves We wave from our cars I wonder about you Do you wonder about me Do you see the same Color red that I see We tune out the news While the barricades fall We act like it’s normal But it isn’t at all Not so sure of anything As we are of ourselves Neither of us buying What the other one sells A chip on your shoulder And a thumb in my eye We grew up so different And I don’t know why I can’t get past it I can’t even begin But I’ll open the door If you want to come in I wonder about you Do you wonder about me Do you see the same Flashing lights that I see
5.
Forces are gathering But we're not at war yet Dinner's almost ready The table is set Take a plate and fill your glass Tell us what you know We live another day With no place else to go Every generation Is kinder than the last You can be who you are Answer honest when you're asked But sometimes power Makes monsters out of those Who's time is running out When they've got no place else to go In the ice and the dust And unimaginable distance In the lifetimes it takes To figure out our own existence We fight to keep fighting To save the thing we know To be here in the morning With no place else to go Pictures frames and postcards In the rubble of our walls The hits keep coming But the city doesn't fall Snow melts like the tears For everyone we know Gone before the springtime With someplace else to go
6.
Maybe we’re the same sides of different coins Just like one another Trying to live up to our mothers Friendship seems so easy When you’re young and unencumbered The years keep turning over It’s different when you’re older Maybe when the sun sets later in the spring We’ll have everybody over And the kids can run around How many ways can we meet in the middle All the things in the way they matter so little At the end of the day I can’t shake the guilty feeling Something was or can’t be done Like everything is stolen And we’re out here on the run Maybe everybody wonders Like I wonder about us now If the stars are just for them The only living souls around Maybe when the lilacs blossom in the spring We’ll have everybody over And the kids can run around How many ways can we meet in the middle All the things in the way they matter so little At the end of the day Maybe when recent history Isn’t recent anymore It gets hard to climb the stairs And dementia’s at the door Maybe this will be the place We’re forever coming back Do you know you’re at your best Before your best is in the past Maybe it’s not our nature To say the things we really mean I keep fumbling with the lock I can’t seem to find the key All our friends are scattered To adventures on the wind I don’t know if and when We’ll be together again Maybe when the birds are back here in the spring We’ll have everybody over And the kids can run around How many ways can we meet in the middle All the things in the way they matter so little At the end of the day
7.
Starlight in every direction Electric fear in your eyes The moon hangs low on the highway Headlights light up the sky Over and over Flags fly over the car lot Sparks like the fourth of july If I could I’d do it all over The guardrail keeps going by Over and over We tumble like socks in the dryer Some moments never seem to end Like sunsets over the boardwalk A swerve just before the bend Keeps playing over and over Keeps playing over and over A tilt a whirl in slow motion The floor drops out and we float The years go by in a moment Until one moment they don’t Over and over When it’s over it’s over
8.
I’ve been overcommitted I’ve been spreading my bets I’ve been borrowing time Against yesterday's debts I’ve got a novel in me I keep meaning to read I’ve got someplace else I’m supposed to be I can’t keep a train Of thought on track I pick up the thread Then I put it right back When it’s said and done I’m the only one Who can’t figure it out Who keeps coming undone You’re never gonna know You’re never gonna know Everything that could have been Everywhere and everywhen Every quick decision Every chain reaction Every broken heart Every crime of passion Is a branch in the brain I’ve been going insane Trying to figure it out Everybody but me Has got it all figured out Everybody but me Never had any doubt Everybody but me Everybody but me Has got it all figured out I’ve been pressing my luck I’ve been out on a limb I got away with the lie So I did it again Everybody but me Has got it all figured out How to make a million How to leverage their clout I can’t keep a train Of thought on track I pick up the thread Then I put it right back When it’s said and done I’m the only one Who can’t figure it out Who keeps coming undone You’re never gonna know You’re never gonna know Everything that could have been Everywhere and everywhen Every quick decision Every chain reaction Every broken heart Every crime of passion Is a branch in the brain I’ve been going insane Trying to figure it out Everybody but me Has got it all figured out Everybody but me Never had any doubt Everybody but me Everybody but me Has got it all figured out
9.
Sometimes a sigh is just a sigh Sometimes you really don’t know why It comes out the way it does What the problem ever was Sometimes a sigh is just a sigh Sometimes a song is just a song Sometimes it’s best just to sing along Rhyming lines and easy answers Simple tunes repeating patterns Sometimes a song is just a song Sometimes the rain is just the rain Sometimes the blues don’t need a name Your mind will work against you Tell you things that just aren’t true Sometimes the rain is just the rain Some days the puzzle stays in pieces Some days you write without a thesis Always with the window open Hoping that the truth will blow in Some days the puzzle stays in pieces Sometimes the rain is just the rain Sometimes the blues don’t need a name Your mind will work against you Tell you things that just aren’t true Sometimes the rain is just the rain Sometimes I wish that I could be you Sometimes I think I broke in two Half of me is young again Watching the whole world begin Sometimes I wish that I could be you Sometimes the rain is just the rain Sometimes the blues don’t need a name Your mind will work against you Tell you things that just aren’t true Sometimes the rain is just the rain
10.
Trade Show 05:30
They found a booth in the back after the keynote let out She swirled the ice in her glass it’s just the two of them now She says what do you think was the time worth the trip He doesn’t know what to say doesn’t know what this is But it ain’t, no it ain’t like that Still it’s nice just to talk and make a new friend On the same side of life when there’s no need to pretend They hadn’t known one another but they knew of their work At the top of their fields but adrift and unsure They talked about light and the nature of time He’d read the same books he was kind in the eyes But it ain’t, no it ain’t like that Still here they were once again In spite of themselves Three days of meetings in a conference hotel He gets up makes his way through the networking crowd The food is all eaten and the music’s too loud He keeps on walking makes his way to the stairs Leaves her alone afraid that he’s overshared Because it ain’t, no it ain’t like that He’s not that kid anymore reckless with hearts Following strangers into the dark I think I startled you there walking in as you came out She says she was thinking of heading back to the hotel anyhow They talked about kids their spouses their lives They could have been anyone walking into the night But it ain’t, no it ain’t like that It’s a different connection it’s a spark without gas Sometimes a question doesn’t need to be asked The years pass like strangers on an airport train It’s nice to be seen from so far away It’s not romantic attraction, not the fear of mistakes It’s the shared secret of wondering the same Maybe they felt the same But it ain’t, no it ain’t like that No it ain’t, not it ain’t like that

credits

released March 15, 2024

Written, performed and recorded by Chris Canipe at home in Kansas City with a few exceptions. Molly Healey performed and arranged the strings on Sides of Different Coins. Lou Nevins plays bass on Expectations, Sides of Different Coins, Sometimes the Rain and Trade Show. Phil Norath plays percussion on Sides of Different Coins. The album was mixed and mastered by Wil Reeves at Centro Cellar Studios in Columbia, Missouri. Cover photo by Aïda Amer www.instagram.com/aeyeduh/

Released: March 15, 2024

Copyright 2024 by Chris Canipe. All Rights Reserved.

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Chris Canipe Kansas City, Missouri

Chris Canipe is a singer-songwriter type guy from Kansas City who records records at home. Sometimes he plays with Malone, an excellent three-songwriter outfit from Columbia, Missouri.

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